The lack of sleep!

Ugh! Baby boy just won't sleep. Tried making sure tummy is full, rocking, diaper changed, white noise, swaddling, over heated(?), you name it... We have tried it. Thing is, two nights ago he slept 6.5 continuous  hours! This was for two nights. The first night he did this I was anxious and afraid as soon as I would sleep, that he would get up! Nope! I missed all that sleep. The next night as soon as I put him down, I went to sleep myself. He slept 6 hours that night and I actually felt awesome the next day! Now baby is back to his old routine of cat napping at night as well. 

Ya know, as I write this blog ..... I really think that he was/is over tired. Could being over tired really make bedtime that much worse? I know he didn't get naps like he should, but this kid just doesn't sleep without being held. Who has time to hold a baby all day with mounds of work piling up for me to do?! I thought the third child was just suppose to adapt and go with the flow? Apparently this kiddo didn't get the memo!

So now after about 3 hours of trying to get him down, he is asleep in my arms while I lay down and type this up. I mean seriously, he was rubbing his eyes... I put him down after a bottle and he would wake up 10 minutes later. Repeated several times. This time I just gave up and decided I needed sleep. Strange thing is... I can't sleep either. I am so tired but can't seem to sleep. Too bad they don't have the Miracle Blanket for adults! Wonder if anyone makes one?!

Sometimes adults need swaddled too!

Or perhaps something to turn your mind off so you can go to sleep. 

Okay, since baby is actually sleeping (again...in my arms), I guess I should go and sleep too. 

Wish me luck!

SNOW DAYS & Sick CHILDREN! UGH!

Since LAST THURSDAY, I have had either both children home or at least one child home due to illnesses and/or snow days. Understand that here in Virginia Beach, SNOW is very rare! We are definitely not equipped to deal with snow on our secondary roads putting buses at risk for skidding in our rural areas and neighborhoods. Today is the FIRST day back since Tuesday and it was SUPPOSE to be their day off for Teacher planning. So the schedule is all messed up as they also put Monday as a half day! And a previously scheduled day off now a day of school. Now if I worked a normal 9-5 job, it would totally screw up a schedule and probably make bosses mad. Good thing I'm my own boss right? Anyway, carrying on.... I still have a child home sick! Poor kiddo has Hyper-Mobility Joint Syndrome and complains of wide-spread pain very often. SO I'm STILL not KID free! And did I mention hubby is TRAVELING? Overall, my children are pretty self sufficient and do their own thing when they are home. But what I complain about is NOT GETTING out of my HOUSE!

I do have a MILLION things to do at home, you know... cleaning, prepare taxes, process pictures.... but it's that I just don't FEEL Like doing it! How many times do YOU put off what you NEED to do just because you don't want to do it?

Things I COULD BE DOING:

1. Removing border in kid's bathroom
2. Preparing my documents for taxes
3. Process client pictures as it's going on a month!
4. Clean my house AGAIN! Never ending battle here right?
5. FOLD Laundry! 

So who wants to do all that when you can just blog about it instead?

I was SUPPOSE to meet up with a friend and eat lunch, but can't take a child that hurts out into this cold weather.

Back to Kiddo who has pain ~ 

At 18 months old the kid stopped walking and went back to crawling and just complained that he "HURT". So many tests later and specialists they said he just had inflammation in his joints even though no bone scans were done. Okay sure, it went away over time using tylenol when he did complain and that seemed to hold him over or he forgot about it after being introduced to a toy. Short attention span in kids :)  Fast forward a few years later, around age 5 he started complaining his arms and legs and body just "ached". Asking him where it hurt, he would just show me all down his arms and legs. Okay I shrugged it off as growing pains and didn't think anything of it as his daddy had told me he had bad ones growing up too. It progressively got more persistent and complaints were frequent. So I had begged the pediatrician to refer him to Rheumatologist. MANY months wait as there were only two in our area (now just 1 :( ). They diagnosed him with just having over extended joints. No specific name just joints and ligaments can extend beyond the normal 180 degrees. I wasn't happy with this answer and wanted a second opinion. Off to Duke Medical to the Children's hospital to get 2nd opinion. The specialists here said the exact same thing and said our doctor is on track, but did give us an actual NAME for the issue at hand. Hyper Mobility Joint Syndrome is the magical name. So NOW I can research and find out how to help him. 

Armed with medications for his pain (Naproxen Sodium liquid) at school and at home we are all set right? Wrong! A child can't work through his pain and also pay attention at school! So we have had a few flare ups. One time it was an entire week he couldn't walk it hurt every step! Went to Rheummy, did X-rays, blood work...etc... Nothing abnormal! This also included a bone scan to see if any of his growth plates and joints were inflamed. NOTHING showed up at all! Ugh! Frustrating to have a silent and undetectable illness. Each time he complains I have to pray that it's not a flare up where we have to go back through all those tests. Know how hard it is to HOLD a 70lb child down while they do blood work?

So now this child is home today complaining of pain all over. No sense in sending him to school  when he will just be coming home a few hours later. 

I just want him to enjoy life and not one in pain. Not many parents facing this issue, so no one to really chat with about the outcome.

Overall, he's a happy little boy and makes me proud on many levels. 

Thanks for listening to my rambles as I know there is no rhyme or reason for the order my rambles go in :)

~ Brandi

Time FLIES when you're a busy mom!

WOW how time does fly when you're a busy mom with a business and PTA involved. We have ventured into our very first year of being in business with the Photography Business and although we haven't gotten the HUGE business we have hoped for, it's a slow work in progress to build your brand and your name. It's all gonna happen in due time. I just know it!

So let's do some rants because it obviously has kept me up all night long thinking of them....

First off... PTA! NEVER have I seen such disrespect for volunteers in ANY business! Just feel used and over worked. And when I do get to do what is needed, it doesn't seem like it's enough. I love helping out the school but not the ones that work in it. Some staff and teachers are very grateful, yet others not so. Just so much to do for NOT being paid!

NEVER enough TIME! I don't know about other women... but to me it seems like I have never enough time to do what needs to be done. From house keeping, to business call backs to processing pictures to running kids to activities and homework. Oh I forgot to mention dinner too! Now how's a lady suppose to do it all in 24 hours? Definitely need more hours in my day! Know where I can get some?

Kids: THESE little boogers are constantly bringing home germs and not listening. I know it comes with their age, but sheesh! They seem to forget manners and all the rules when they get home from school. I know my two are angels in school... (well at least one of them is) and listen to their teacher and follow all rules, but doesn't mean you can forget what rules are required at home! At least we're not having melt downs with homework anymore!

We did have a fantastic summer! We went to Penn State then to the Smoky Mountains! It was GREAT And LOTS of fun!!! 

WOW It's been a LONG time since I've posted here. But will try to start posting more often :)
Night!

Rural India

Driving back from Surat, Gujarat we took the inner roads. I mean one doesn't get much choice here! Lol

These roads travel through many villages and farm lands. Going from a township ( which is different from life in the city) to villages made up of tarps and farm animals for their daily living is a huge difference one can't even imagine. Here I am stuck in my little car and little world with all the comforts I could have. In these villages, the entire family heads off to work their fields including the children. No school for these children, but they do learn from the lands. They may not be educated in reading and writing, but farming and meeting their basic needs is well known. Sadly, these children don't get to enjoy life as our own children will get to. But that doesn't seem to bother them as I pass children with big smiles on their face.

Often through these small villages, I would see villagers building infrastructure. No hat, obviously not educated and without shoes and proper attire. Even people digging pipeline ditches with a bowl! But it works for them as they seem to get them dug and built! Sometimes this construction is to fix roads. In that case, the road just is closed off usually by putting huge rocks in the way. No notice, just inconvenience. The road travelers don't mind, they keep trucking by but at a slower pace pushing by the cars going opposite way. No one gets angry as they all wait their turn. Some bigger trucks attempt to pass by going over the rocks, but they soon give up! A simple way to prevent passage on a road! Lol

Passing over many bridges as we go, there are no railings on the sides to prevent you from falling off. Drivers with mutual understanding not to be hasty in their driving and share the road. Not like road rage we face in USA. Maybe they have some here with road rage, but for general driving population we encountered...I didn't see one person on a rickshaw, scooter or car upset traffic wasn't moving as fast as they wanted. Maybe our roads have too many rules that we don't give people a chance to use common sense enough to handle driving responsibily. Maybe that's what causes road rage in mour country? Who knows!?

Being in a rural part of India with many miles to travel from a city, there is not a central place to worship, but many people want to say prayers for the things God has given them. Since their faith is different than what I am used to, I will tell you what I see from a Christian stand point. They practice religion on their own. Spiritual faith is an individual relationship with God. No one to answer to, no one to judge you if you haven't attended in a while and no one to comment on your personal walk. One is left alone to pray how one feels is right. Usually this is taught at an early age by seeing the parents or older siblings pray. Yes around the towns there are fancy temples and some do attend, but not a dedicated time like we do on Sunday here. It could very well be due to the fact that Sunday is their only day of rest here as they work six days a week. Or in another hand, this country is very old and has been practicing this way for centuries. It works for them, so why change it. Back to the rural parts of India...every few miles I would see a road side temple. So regardless where you are from in India, you always have a place to worship if one does choose to. Even when I didn't see a soul around, there were temples, so there had to be people near by.

Now at home, some have a small temple for themselves and do daily pooja. Which is prayers. But sometimes in their faith they want to speak to someone who has blessings from one of their many gods. That's when some visit the temples. The ones who are at the temples and offer blessings for these people, actually live at the temple with a usually no luxeries other than pleasing gods. They feel it's their life work to be there for others. One could say that they don't think it's different from Christianity, but from a insider on both faiths....it is. Hard to describe in a blog. One must feel the peacefulness in a temple.

Operations in India

Day to day operations in india go on regardless of the weather or what's happening elsewhere in the world. Doesn't matter what job you have, it matters that you HAVE a job and one is happy to travel for it. Everyday shops open around 10am here for the general population. Either you're there at work, or you're just now heading into work. All I know is that the traffic heavily increases on the roads at that time of day. One would see carts on the road carrying their supplies to and from their residence to their own shop in another part of the city. All of this on the main road too!!! Cows, buffalo along with dogs, cats, carts, cars and scooters share the road with nothing but pleasant honking of the horns to let the one in front of you know that you wish to pass and to move over. Strangely, the animals seem to realize this too! No shouting, or pointing of fingers happen here, one kindly moves over with a nod and a smile.

Although honking in America is not heard often, my own two children don't seem to even notice how noisy it is now compared to "home". They don't stare or even bat an eye at the poverty around here. Now they are upset that the toy shop don't open till 10:00am! Haha!

Yesterday, I was granted permission to visit the local private school that my husband attended in his 11th and 12th grade standard. The school does split schooling with the older grades attending in the morning with the younger ones going in the afternoon. This school was used back in the late 1800s to early 1900s as horse stables. Now converted into a school the doors remain the same. Nothing has changed but adding desks and chalk boards to the equation. Seriously the school is OPEN and accessible only by walking outside. Not closed schools like we have in the USA.

During my time of visitation, the grades attending were LKG (lower kindergarten) and SKG (senior kindergarten) through grade 2. What we would call pre-k and kindergarten. Inside these small classrooms sat small two person desks, a small desk for a teacher and a chalkboard. Not the new smartboards that we now put in our public schools. No computers per classroom, no crayons to color. Just pencils and paper. The children were cautious to acknowledge my presence and looked to their teacher for guidance. I observed the classroom from the back and the teacher started to teach. These children were NOT learning Hindi or other regional language. They were learning numbers 1-20 on the chalkboard. On their desks sat a worksheet on the letters H, I, J & K that had previously been used for another lesson and they were using the back of the sheet. (all about recycling here). I had my son Aryan with me. And he also took note at how small these desks were and was shocked to see these children learning with so little. No books for them to open. Just a two person desk and the children excited to learn! But attending this school is a privilege. The entrance fee is 1250 rupees, which is around $25.00 a month. The school is paid on "terms". First term's fee was 6000 rupees, which is around $150.00 for six months. So total yearly is around $325.00 including entrance fee. This school which is called Baroda High School, was one of the most prestigious schools around during my husband's time. Apparently it still is considered the top school in the city. In regards to admissions to this school, they are hard to come by. A school with an excellent reputation often has many applicants. Sometimes children are turned away, but if one knows the right people and has enough money to pay...one can often attend regardless how bad or mischievous the child is! (my husband was one of those children!) It often is who you know and the social status of your family that keeps a family ahead. So it's very difficult to get ahead if you are already poor and uneducated in India. All goes back to the roots of the family.

Getting back to the children.....

Some classes were outside rehearsing for an upcoming performance for their families to see at a later date. They were dancing and singing so joyfully! Others were in classrooms learning in unison on chalkboards. A very simplistic approach goes a long way in India. At the end of their education, these children will walk away with the best education offered in this small local town. Often attending the most prestigious colleges in India.

In India, there ARE public schools, but the quality of the education one receives there isn't the best. If a family has money at all, they will send their child to a private school. Education is VERY important here and school is 6 days a week here as well! Private schools are a thriving business here as many parents of higher society wish to send their kids to the best. A LOT of competition here considering the population. You have to stand out SOMEHOW!

What I did find amazing, was that all these children regardless of their backgrounds, go and play with each other. Fly kites, laugh and just enjoy childhood. Later on in life are they reminded about socialization among their peers. Only thing that separates these children (from what I can see when two children are playing) is their after school clothes.

Stepping outside of this school, one sees poverty in which obviously separates the well off people from the day to day strugglers. Outside is makeshift shacks with dogs and pigs rummaging through trash. Yet there are children playing and enjoying the day with a smile on their face. One has to use the restroom, so he just lifts up his shirt and pees where he is standing and runs off to play. No pants, shoes or underwear on! But to him, it was normal!

I stepped out to take some pictures to document my journey.

(pics to come soon!)

Observing India

Observing India is like looking at makeshift homes. Everyone busy having a job to do, whether it is selling of crappy products or making kites or rummaging through trash for anything of use.

Feeling like the albino outcast in this ever busy 3rd world country and being looked at like I am the only one they have ever seen in their life, I get the chance to experience the city first hand. Currently sitting at their equivalent of a DMV, I take and notice all the smells and sounds around me. Not to mention trying to absorb the surroundings of everyday lives in India.

Behind me sit a row of "flats", what we call apartment or condos in America. I notice their work of laundry hanging out to dry and continued house cleaning throughout the day. Where as in USA, most parents would be working or running children to and from activities. Here there is no rush or hurries in this part of the world. Just the simple joy of having a place to call home and maintaining it out of pure enjoyment. Something I may never understand.

Before me in a parking lot of their "DMV", the hustle and bustle of newly found freedom on the roads keeps the joyful buzz in the air. Seems like people gather together to celebrate this moment in each other's lives. A person here feels loved and wanted. A part of a "community". One is never alone in such a world like this.

So much chatter and noise with horns honking and motorcycles revving up, yet one can still hear the hundreds of birds up in the trees.

Many children just walk among the streets. Ages here seem younger than what anyone in America would say is safe to walk along the streets in USA. Perhaps we coddle our children too much? But in hindsight, the children roam and respect traffic coming and going.

I watch as two little boys giggle together on their way to a local stall to purchase a snack. No shoes on, mismatch clothes and filthy as ever....they are so happy to have money for a treat! Their anticipation of eating and sharing this snack brings joy to their simplistic lives. They SHARE one bag of chips. Just a small one at that! I personally know my two children would fight over the bag, but not here, they share so peacefully and give the biggest smile at me when I look at them.

A mother on the side of the street with no cover over her head, gently plays with her baby as if no one else in the world exists at that moment! As long as the baby is smiling back and cooing to her she is happy and it shows on her face.

Observing a naked child, probably no older than 3 years old, on the sides of the road about to take a dip into the local reservoir. Parents probably working and being watched by other siblings, or if they are around they aren't so "dotting" as American parents where we don't allow our children out till much much older.

I asked the question to my husband, "Why have more children if you can't afford them?" He replied, "The children are simply extra hands to help." One would consider it irresponsible in my upbringing to bring a child into the world if one could not afford them. Another onlooker say from a country like India, would consider it resourceful. Anyway one looks at the situation is right depending on one's upbringing. Here the children don't burden the parents with too much upkeep. No diapers ( have nature!), no pre-school or daycare (have friends and older siblings), and no toys (world is their playground!). As soon as one can walk, they are helping out their families as much as possible.

So in closing of this entry.... "Life is simple, so many times we take things for granted. Look around you and take notice of the simple life that can be yours."